<3 is a heart.
3< is a fart.
“I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living. It’s a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope, which is what I do, and that enables you to laugh at life’s realities.”
— Dr. Seuss (via theremina)
(via electronicalrattlebag)
Most disturbing dream of the weekend was the foursome with Bianca from Eastenders, Amy Winehouse (alive) and Russell Brand while in the house of the woman who was going to supply me with all the kittens.
| Mum: | Hi, you alright? |
| Me: | Yes thanks. |
| Mum: | I'm just ringing because I'm drunk at a wedding and I can't remember the name of that crazy American comedian with the funny hair and glasses that you like so much. |
| Me: | *pause* Woody Allen? |
| Mum: | That's it thanks! |
| Me: | Okay, bye. |
Material for Billy Connolly in a notebook from 2005:
“I was putting my willy up my wife (back and forth and back and forth) but my willy went floppy so I did a wee hard jobby and put that in instead”.
If you are Billy Connolly’s agent, feel free to get in touch.
HOW THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE WAS DEVELOPED (by FactSpy)
The History of English in ten minutes.
